Ok, I solved the "disconecting" problem by turning off my satalites. They were (way) too close.
ORIGINLLY, before Orbi, I was told I needed satalites because my original router was optimized for HORIZONTAL coverage mostly, and my house is stacked vertically, so when I upgraded to the Orbi I got a satalite for each floor... turns out WAY to much signal.
Once I turned off my satalites 99% of my disconect problems went away. I still am connected on all three (3) floors from the router in the basement of my cottage with more than enough speed for video conferences and streaming.
If you are having disconnection problems and are running either satalites or extenders, try turning them off. If you can see your neighbors Wifi you probably don't need a satalite/extender. You are fighting YOURSELF as your device struggles to find the best signal between several of your OWN signals, all on the same channel, all named the same... it gets confused.
iOS is very active trying to find the absolutely best signal, and every time it "looks" it has the opertunity to get confused... and seem to freeze... lots of signal, no sign of an error, network still happy... make sure you are not confusing your devices with your OWN congestion...
