XR500 Gaming Router Playstation 4 showing as offline, Newest Firmware 2.3.2.56 no fix?

So I have seen a lot of posts on different forums about this! ( Netgear, Dumos, Reddit ) It has been close to 2 years now. Device offline issues in the device manager software as well as not being monitored in Network monitoring even though the devices are clearly connected and operating. PS4's, Xbox's, PC's, and Laptops. It seems like it is more present with LAN connected devices. The first workaround I saw for the PS4 issue was to leave your PS4 on standby and never turn it off. If you do turn it off the router wouldn't see it again until you reboot the router. The resolution I have seen presented many times is to downgrade firmware to 2.3.2.32. However, I have only seen one individual actually say that this has fixed his issue. The complaints in 2018 and 2019 seemed to point at issue with 2.3.2.40 firmware. I see a lot people have tried a lot of things like static IP's and different settings in Dumos without any luck. Now to me!
April 2020 I want to upgrade my router and go with the highly boasted "Best Gaming Router" XR500! I got the XRM570 package with the EX7700 extender because I have a large house and lots of devices. I am now a 5 days into this thing and I want to make it a $400 Frisbee. This came with the latest firmware 2.3.2.56 preloaded and it still has the same issue almost 2 years later. When I first hooked it up it seemed to be great and working beautifully the first day. Mapped my devices, monitored traffic, set my Antibufferbloat. I played a few games and turned my hardwired PS4 off. Woke the next day signed into router to play some COD Warzone and found it was showing my PS4 offline even though it was clearly connected. It was showing my second PS4, which is connected wireless, online with data transferring in network monitoring tab, even though it was completely powered off. I tried running the test connection on my wired PS4 to see if it would see the device and nothing. I started playing a game and saw the traffic spike on a device named Local Host. I already had set my QOS for priority on my two PS4 consoles. I had already added the the two PS4's to the Geo filter. Now it looks like the router is not utilizing any of the Gaming features in the software. I can't monitor traffic if can't even trust what device it's showing me. Now I'm contemplating naming the local host a "console" and adding it to the Geo filter and adding Local host to Qos antibufferbloat. This router is restricting the gaming consoles while simultaneously limiting down my connection to my laptops and other streaming devices. The exact opposite of what it is supposed to do. The Dumos software is why I bought this but if it doesn't work, shouldn't I just buy a regular router? If the fix is to revert to 2.3.2.32 Firmware, won't I be missing all the Security fixes and advances in the last two firmware updates? I started researching my issue to see if there had been a fix and that's when I saw the last two years of comments and forums with people chasing tails and no real fix. Before I spend anymore time messing with this thing, should I just return it and get a Nighthawk X6s or AX8? If no one has found a resolution and implemented it in the last two years have they given up? Is this the kind of support I can expect if I have an issue with one of the other Nighthawk routers. Will this ever get a fix now that AX / Wifi 6 is out? Please give me some solid advice before I pass my return window for this thing.
I have a 3800 Sqft. 2 story with 20 plus devices. 3 are wired Hopper3, DirecTv genie2 and the main PS4. The second PS4 is on 5ghz band, 2 Smart Tv's and appliances, Roku Tv, DirecTv Genie2 server and 4k receiver, Hopper 3 with multiple Joey's, Apple Air and ipad, 2 iphones, 2 Android phones and laptop, Cameras with wifi DVR. Doorbell camera and alarm using Wifi as well.
Cox Gogablast internet - modem putting out 775up/35dwn on average...